Rollercoaster

Edit and re-edit. Final edit? Never.

Learning about myself, my world

I find my creativity is cyclical and goes something like this (starting at a random point in the circle - since it is cyclical there is no beginning step): curiosity about the world, followed by observation of the world and the inherent beauty all around me - the buildings, the colours, the crows scrambling in their flying cities...I feel tuned in and intimate with life. I feel connected and special and energetic. I wouldn't say I'm 'channeling' the energy around me because that implies some kind of harnessing, or focusing when really I feel as if I'm caught up in a current that is flowing through me, lighting up my dim bulb perspective again. I begin to read meaningful books; books about questions, theology, philosophy and sometimes motorcycle mechanics come my way and I learn. Learning is intoxicating. Once I begin I don't want to stop, but that desire is also cyclical. And through this learning stage, ideas pop up about subject or material and usually I have several false starts and nothing feels right at the drawing table. Sometimes I give up, sometimes I persist (depends when the deadline is!) but when I hit upon something that works it is like finding the key to the treasure room and I can't get the gold out fast enough. That eureka! moment is precious. I work like crazy, the images consume my thoughts and even as I'm working on one thing I'll have another quick fire 'wonder if I do this...' and the image will take another twist. Because of this method of working, that is - being driven by the material, I can't guarantee what will happen and I can't even guarantee the subject will be as originally intended. After this intense period of creation *read: deadline has been narrowly met*, I don't want to look at that drawing table for a long time. I hibernate, watch tv, give my brain a rest. Slowly I'll come back to life to the life around me, but it's any one's guess how long that will take. Soon enough though, I become curious again, and start noticing again, and the cycle repeats itself....gratefully.

Done. Huh?

Well, kind of. Of course I have to scramble tomorrow morning to find a couple of correct-sized nails, but then it's taxi time, and off to The Playhouse...
I apologize for the less than verbose blog entries as of late; I am burnt out, world. I seriously intend to store those paintbrushes for awhile...I really need a break. I want to read some poetry. I want to take some pictures. I want to read The Dark Tower again. I want to visit friends and listen to music and drink wine.
I can't believe I'm done. Thank you, Lord.

Need to Breathe

I am having trouble breathing because I can't find enough time for work, Georgia, sleep and painting. Something's gotta give, and it aint work, or Georgia - I've tried cutting back on sleep but my body has a way of asserting itself....and so I am so behind on this painting and making the other pieces exhibition ready that I am feeling the air being squeezed out of my throat faster than I can take it in.
But no worries! I'm good at flying by the seat of my pants...

Press release for 'Possible Selves'

PRESS RELEASE (VISUAL ARTS)

September 22, 2010

On October 1, Gallery Connexion's Annex Gallery reveals two exhibitions. “Earthly Beauties: The Painted Works of Andrea Crabbe and Kim Vose Jones” and “Possible Selves” a show of collage that incorporates photography, painting and drawing by Marsha Clark. The Annex Gallery is located in the Playhouse at 686 Queen St.. Please join us for an opening reception Friday, October 1 at 5 p.m. The exhibition will run until Monday, November 15 , 2010.

Crabbe and Vose Jones bring us work created from different eyes, recorded at different times, and within different landscapes. They offer a lift to the spirit, and offer identity to places and people real and imagined. In silent conversation these vibrant, works share unique qualities. They strive to capture the memorable, and transform the everyday into dreamlike, otherworldly experience. Kim Vose Jones is a Master of Fine Arts candidate in Studio Art at Maine College of Art. Her two and three dimensional work has been exhibited and collected internationally. Andrea Crabbe holds a BFA from NSCAD University. She has taught introductory painting at NSCAD’s School of Extended Studies and maintains an active painting practice in Halifax, Nova Scotia.

In ‘Possible Selves’, Clark explores the question of identity formation. What is identity? How does it form? What psychological, physical and social environmental elements comprise identity? How does it grow and change, yet the basis remain the same? Using the house as a metaphor for a life, architectural elements are built up and torn down to represent the growth of our individual personality. Clark's background as a fine furniture maker and experience in carpentry has helped her understand how structures are built; the interior frame work and the numerous joints, connections and fastenings that are necessary for a structure to function properly. Much like a person is built, our identity is made up of numerous connections, experiences and turning points to produce a specific personality. This is a show of collage that incorporates photography, painting and drawing.

The Annex Gallery is an initiative between Gallery Connexion and the Fredericton Playhouse to provide a juried exhibition space for Gallery Connexion members and for the Playhouse to include a programmed exhibitions in its galleries.

The Annex Gallery is organized by a Gallery Connexion committee and facilitated by the Fredericton Playhouse. For more information, contact Rita Sassani at nnxgallery@gmail.com

Digital Invite is Here!

Just Keep Swimming, Just Keep Swimming, Swimming Swimming

So I worked with the background. I have come to realize that my need for perfection is what holds me back most of the time...because I am not perfect (not even close), nor will I ever attain perfection in my work. "An artist never completes her work, she merely abandons it." The best thing to do is to keep trying.

I ended up with orange and pink clouds and a blue black strip with cosmos. I think I'll leave it for tonight. It's definitely different from the previous collages, but then, conversion to Christianity was/is off my grid of previous experience. I have other things on my mind though...interfering with the desire to paint. I'm waiting to hear about a possible job with St. Paul's church, a dear friend of mine is in the hospital again, and I am fighting a deep dissatisfaction with being a single woman. The lesbian community is a tough one to break into around here...especially when they find out I'm "religious". "I don't do religious girls, sorry. Too much latent guilt." Oy.

Grid

The title of this fifth collage is Conversion: My Father, the Architect. This has been the most explosively creative, but trickiest piece yet. I have a lot of emotions wrapped up in this piece; as with most things human, it's not straightforward OR simple. What do you think of when I say 'Conversion'? Do I want to marry a man and have to convert to Catholicism so his mother will like me? Have I gone off the deep end and joined the Spaghetti Monster Cult? Have I become one of those crazy conservative fanatical Christians?

I admit the term 'born again Christian' was a stumbling block for me. I now call myself a recovering Evangelist (which is bound to piss off a few people). Bottom line, though, is that my personal relationship with God has enriched my life in ways I never could have believed 'before'. He likes to speak to us in the language we can hear, and for me, that is beauty and order. He reminds me of His presence in the intricate detailing of antique brass doorknobs, the framing of a street scene, the correct use of the semi colon. Logic and beauty and order and overflowing detail serve as a divine language to me - I can appreciate the 'otherness' in this world's creation. I'm learning (painfully slowly) that relationships are like houses, too. Built divinely, added to extensively, torn down, broken down, built up again but always growing, always worth something. So translating this impression of God as Divine Architect through collage is really a wonderful, positive thing - despite any hurt that came after conversion. I've done a faint and partial architectural drawing of an expansive church, then paint in a pale and glowing sky. I'll build my own church with photographs of local sanctuaries, taken from many different angles and pieced together for an Escher-like walk around the block. There's sure to be some creative choices you'll wonder about, but that's a good thing...gets people talking about the right thing. Cheers!

The heat has broken and I am ready again

I finished off the third roll with Georgia's help and got the pictures developed; the interior stained glass shots turned out really well. I now have them all butchered up into components and perhaps tomorrow night will begin assembling them. I pilfered a nice big piece of dry wall from my father's shed to be the canvas for this fifth (of six) collage. I'm really starting to get nervous now...do I have enough work to show? Will it look amateurish or childish? Will everyone think I'm ridiculous?
These anxieties try to take hold, but I fight it with whatever I've got.

I am greatly inspired by MC Escher's warped view of reality. The view of this church is also very intriguing. Shot two rolls of film yesterday and today; must shoot one more tomorrow morning then get it developed. Too hot to work, but must do something! Deadlines looming near. Completed the press release and artist statement text today for Possible Selves; show at RBC opening tomorrow. The piece is located at the RBC in Brookside Mall.

Possible Selves: Solo show at The Playhouse

I am also working on creating new work for my first solo show, opening October 1, 2010, at The Playhouse Annex Gallery. Here is the first draft of the essay to accompany the show:

Possible Selves: an exploration of identity

What is identity? How does it form? What psychological, physical and social environmental elements comprise identity? How does it grow and change, yet the basis remain the same?

I intend to explore the question of the formation of identity through images of architectural elements built and torn down. My background as a fine furniture maker and experience in carpentry has helped me understand how structures are built; the interior frame work and the numerous joints, connections and fastenings that are necessary for a structure to function properly. Much like a person is built, our identity is made up of numerous connections, experiences and turning points to produce a specific personality.

The neo-Erikson identity status paradigm, largely developed by James Marcia, focuses upon the twin concepts of experimentation and commitment in identity formation; beginning with our temperament, an individual experiments with elements of personal and social traits, either rejecting or committing to a desired behavior or concept. I intend to explore this idea with six to eight images, all beginning with the same architectural base. Each image will be built up and torn down using cut up photographs of local architectural elements and buildings. I will take both digital and manual photographs using a digital camera and a 1972 Minolta SRT 200. I will isolate and cut up the photographs, then reassemble them, beginning from the same architectural base. I shall use paint and ink to accentuate areas and tracing paper, tissue paper, vellum and other media to build up texture in certain areas. I may also draw scenes or images of my past as the background sky or use text to give the viewer a sense of what personality concept is being rejected or committed to.